Waking up at 3 am and have a sudden thought... How would it be like if I stop conforming to what other Christians or unspoken standard and rules set by other Christians and the church but start loving? I wonder, how would it be like if right or wrong wasn't so important but have loved or not becomes the focus? Slowly, I have placed my identity on doing what is right or wrong, if I do wrong, I felt awfully bad about myself (which is normal to a certain extend) but I felt it has been hitting my core when I do right, I felt closer to God. Was it suppose to be that way? I wonder.. I never know.. that this has chained me secretly.. to wanna gain approval from God, to "please Him"? Secretly think that he would punish me just because I did something wrong even when I repented.. It can be so immobilizing don't you think?
Love.. what does it look like without the background noises that flooded my vision? Stop pursuing right-ness and start loving. Would like to try that out. :)
Romans 8:6 The mind of sinful man is death, but the mind controlled by the Spirit is life and peace. <3 p="">
